Friday, 8 February 2013

Express you feelings

A person cannot respect your feelings if you do not express them. Don't expect the other person will just know what to do or understand how you'll feel. Wearing rose-colored glasses in the beginning of a relationship could be leather. Often, as a passive partner you are afraid of expressing your feeling because you don't want to rock the “happiness” boat. “Gosh,” you say to yourself, “if I tell her again I don't like it when she calls at work, I'll probably hurt her feelings, or she might not call at all anymore.
That would be awful.” So you don't say anything. Now, not only have you made it impossible for the other person to respect your feelings (Because she doesn't know what they are), you've also deprived yourself of the opportunity to see if this individual would respect your feelings if she did know what they were. Don't assume that because someone is paying you compliments and giving you attention or being romantic that she is full of good intentions. You have no idea what her true intentions are at this point.

Be willing to express your feelings. If your lover or friend genuinely cares about you, she will be willing to listen to how you feel and to work with you on an issue. Stand up for yourself when you feelings are not taken into consideration. Be willing to say, for
example, “I don't like when people come unannounced to my home. Please call first to see if it's a good time for you to come over,” or “It's not convenient for me for you to come over tonight, let's plan a different time together.

How many times have your feelings been hurt because you mistakenly assumed someone else knew what you thought or expected? Do you ever become annoyed or angry with someone who acted differently than you expected?

Have you found yourself saying?
“If you really loved me, you would…”
“Why didn’t you…”
“You should…”
         It doesn’t matter what kind of relationship you are in. Each person’s expectations play a large part in determining the health of the relationship. Perceptions of a relationship change when there is a contrast between the ideal and the real. The partnership strengthens when one begins to see the relationship for what it really is. Having unrealistic or unfulfilled expectations is a sure way to ruin a relationship. When an individual has a strong desire that their partner meet their impossible expectations they become blinded to who their partner really is. Even if the partner tries to meet the expectations, it will never be exactly what their partner wants. This is because expectations in relationships are most often unattainable. We all have a preconceived notion of what we want in our ideal mate, and this is how expectations are conceived.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...